Dissatisfied Housewives

This, I swear to you is not an article that rips on Desperate Housewives. I don't care about that show.

This is about the fact that I am tired of hearing housewives complain that their life is hard. It's not so much that they anger me, as that there are a few things I would love to tell them that they could do to make it more bearable, but it would probably come off as sounding rude.

1. Get a job
I know it sounds simple, but it is true. I feel like a lot of the women (or men) who are dissatisfied just aren't challenged. They went from having a job where they had goals and had to race against time and got to interact with competitors and peers to being in the house ALL DAY doing things that they used to accomplish in their spare time. How could that be challenging? You don't have a boss, you have no real deadlines, etc. etc. Unless you have small children or MANY children then being a housewife cannot be that hard. You are doing things that I do on my time off and I have two jobs.

Now I know that back in the 30's and 40's (and before that) most women who were married were housewives and that it did take them all day to do this work. But that was before modern conveniences. Let me give you a hypothetical time line to demonstrate:

Life in the 30's-
5 am- Get up, get dressed, start cooking. Make everything from scratch, because you have no other option. The children will help you but they aren't that much help. The older kids dress the younger ones to teach both independence. Pack a lunch for kids and husband while making breakfast. Chances are you have 5 children instead of 2.5 like the year 2008. No time to talk to your husband since you are so busy.

6am- Kids walk to school, husband is off to work. Start cleaning the dishes. Clean everything by hand. You have no paperware and no dishwasher. If you are quick you can be done by 7.

7am- Walk to the store. It is a mile away.

7:30 AM- Shop for groceries for the day. You must go grocery shopping at least every three days if you want fresh meats and cheeses since your icebox sucks and you have to carry everything home, so you can't have that many bags even if you have a wheeled carry all.

8 AM- Walk home with groceries.

8:30 AM- Start cooking again. You need to start now or it won't be ready for dinner and you family will be pissed.

9:30 AM- You sit down for a few minutes. You have really been working the past four and half hours and your feet hurt because they haven't invented good supporting sneakers yet. You eat for the first time today.

9:45- Back to work. The meat is in the oven. Time to start washing clothes by hand. You must work at this everyday since you have 5 kids and you have no washer or dryer.

10:45- Continue working on dinner.

11:45- Start cleaning pots and cooking utensils by hand.

12:45- make and eat lunch

1:30- Clean floors and brass by hand.

3:00- Get kids from school.

3:00-5:00- Take care of kids, work on homework with them, do more chores, check on dinner, set the table.

5:00- Dad comes home. Talk to him for the first time today.

5:30- Serve dinner. Eat with family.

6:30- Clean dishes by hand again. Children will help.

7:30- The day is over. You clocked in a 14 hour day today with one 45 min break and an hour break during meals, but you forgot to clean the bathroom. Add that to tomorrow's list.

And now a day in the life of a 2008 housewife* (without many small children who aren't in school or a disabled child you keep at home)

*These events are not based on speculation or stereotypes, but by what I have observed repeatedly by two individuals who will remain unnamed because I like them to much to embarrass them.

7AM- wake up. No need to rush to get dressed, you can do that after the kids go to school. Make yourself coffee, talk to the husband, listen to the news. The kids make themselves cereal.

7:55-8:00- Check kids backpack for homework, put dishes in dishwasher. Walk kids to bus stop.

8:00-9:30- Get showered, get dressed, eat breakfast, watch TV, talk to girlfriend on the phone about your day and how you hate grocery shopping.

9:30-11:30-Put some meat product in the crock pot. Throw a load of clothes into the washer. Drive to grocery store. Leisurely grocery shop. Talk to every friend you run into. This will be the only time you go shopping this week, other than a quick run into a convenience store.

11:30-11:45- Unpack groceries. Change over wash.

11:45-12:45- Go out to lunch with a friend.

12:45- Fold wash from first load. Change over to next load. Vacuum a few rooms.

1:45-Look at catalogs.

2:15-Check crock pot. Fold the rest of the clothes.

2:30-Talk on the phone with a friend. Put pictures into a picture book. Shop online for decorations.

3:30- Kids come home. Talk to them about their day. Work on homework with them. Finish preparing dinner. Kids set the table.

5:30- Dad comes home. Eat with family.

6:30-7: Wash the few dishes that couldn't fit into the dishwasher.

Your day is over, and you actually worked around six hours today with 4 and a half hours of breaks including meals. You completed all of the same work as your 1930s counterpart, and there is no reason why you should be tired unless you have chronic fatigue syndrome or you drank too much at lunch with your friend. (Hey, it happens)

Once again, it might be that you hate being a housewife because you don't feel challenged.

2. Stop doing unnecessary shit.

It seems like most people that I run into that aren't unchallenged are simply over burdened. And they still don't have the same satisfaction they had in the work force. So if you can't or won't get a job at least cut back on the things that you don't NEED to do. That means that you don't have to volunteer for every committee, just do one. You don't need to sign you kids up for every class, and sport. Let them be kids. You don't need to be there for them through every little thing. So put the 300 page parenting book down if you have already read five of them and let your kids fail at something. They need to know failure by themselves before they are in college anyway or they are going to be a mess.

3. Remember this and find comfort in it: You don't have a boss.

And if you feel like your husband, kids or anyone else in your life is your boss then it is because you need to work on your relationship with them and it has nothing to do with being a housewife. Lay down the law.


I hope this helps, or was at least entertaining.