Some of the best shit that I write is off the top of my head. So, today I thought "let's just do this off the top of your head," which made me think of my cock. Wonderful. This lead to the thought of internet porn. Then I pondered "do I have any thoughts on internet porn?" and here is what I came up with.
1) Yes I do like internet porn.
2) It sucks that kids can so easily watch it.
It used to be that if you wanted to see porn before you were 18 that you had to go through something to get a hold of it. Nowadays any kid with an idiot parent that either doesn't know how to safeguard their computer or doesn't care (more likely) can sit on their fat ass and left click his way through countless free websites.
Back in the day you would have to conspire with friends and sacrifice time and energy to get your hands on porn. Remember that one kid whose dad would let him do illegal shit so that he would like dad more since his parents were now divorced and mom was now always referred to as "my bitch of an ex-wife" by dad when he talked to other adults. Yeah, you would have to work with that kid to score some porn and he was usually a dick who thought he was better than you.
You would have to pool your money and even share that shit because the little fucker would jack up the prices since he knew you had no other option. You might have to hide it out in the woods and run if you thought someone was coming.
So see, there you have all kinds of good things that would come out of acquiring smut the old fashioned way. You would have to work together with others, plan ahead, use team work and sometimes even get some exercize when you ran from anyone who might catch you.
Now all of that is gone. Just click here and you can watch any kind of porn you want.
That was another bonus of the old school porn. You never had any idea what kind it was going to be until you put it on. The boxes were so big that you would ditch them. "Dark Angels" might be about goth girls. We should grab this one. Oh, its an all black porn, I didn't see that coming. And porn back then was also HILARIOUS. My kids and the next generation will have no idea what I am talking about when I make the "so.....I see your heater is broken. I guess I'll just have to heat you up. Hehe" reference to an unsuspecting stranger. This may be a good thing, but I digress. The days of the poorly acted plot porn seem to be going the way of the dodo. Poor Ron Jeremy.
Thursday, December 4, 2008
Friday, November 28, 2008
Action Movies and Dance Movies are Inbred Cousins
It's true.
I was discussing this with my girlfriend the other day while Dancin in the Streets or White Kids Dress Like Puffy and Dance was on. (I have no idea what the hell half of these movies are called.) Actually, it was more like I talked and she said something like "Yeah, you're right. Now shhhh...this is where they dance."
So maybe you will agree too. Both genres have mostly bad acting and stringy scripts that simply connect one visually appealing scene to the next. These scenes have their own art to them and can take lots of time, but let's not kid ourselves. It's mindless entertainment, and there is nothing wrong with that. You don't really learn anything from either one and you usually leave happy if that is your kind of mindless entertainment. Here is a skeleton of a script for either genre to further prove my point.
Beginning of movie introduces main character and their struggle/shows off their ability by either a) dancing or b) kicking ass. Someone betrays them by a) killing a family member or b) saying they can't really dance and maybe that they are poor or dirty or "you got served" (Did McDonalds write that one or what? ) Enter optional training sequence. Action man kills his way to the top, dancer dances his/her way to the top. Final show down. Lots of one liners everywhere. Hero wins and gets the girl/ boy/ both. The End. Everyone leaves the theater saying "wow, remember when he did this? I wish I could (fly through the air, shoot someone in the head through their own sniper lense, dance like that, beat someone to death with their own arm, etc.,etc.)
Now take this info and go write Transporter 4 and Step Up 3! And for God's sake add more pun laden one liners!
I was discussing this with my girlfriend the other day while Dancin in the Streets or White Kids Dress Like Puffy and Dance was on. (I have no idea what the hell half of these movies are called.) Actually, it was more like I talked and she said something like "Yeah, you're right. Now shhhh...this is where they dance."
So maybe you will agree too. Both genres have mostly bad acting and stringy scripts that simply connect one visually appealing scene to the next. These scenes have their own art to them and can take lots of time, but let's not kid ourselves. It's mindless entertainment, and there is nothing wrong with that. You don't really learn anything from either one and you usually leave happy if that is your kind of mindless entertainment. Here is a skeleton of a script for either genre to further prove my point.
Beginning of movie introduces main character and their struggle/shows off their ability by either a) dancing or b) kicking ass. Someone betrays them by a) killing a family member or b) saying they can't really dance and maybe that they are poor or dirty or "you got served" (Did McDonalds write that one or what? ) Enter optional training sequence. Action man kills his way to the top, dancer dances his/her way to the top. Final show down. Lots of one liners everywhere. Hero wins and gets the girl/ boy/ both. The End. Everyone leaves the theater saying "wow, remember when he did this? I wish I could (fly through the air, shoot someone in the head through their own sniper lense, dance like that, beat someone to death with their own arm, etc.,etc.)
Now take this info and go write Transporter 4 and Step Up 3! And for God's sake add more pun laden one liners!
The Slow Inevitable Death of the Rockstar
Hi. Have you listened to any music lately? Isn't it awful?
I know that is a shitty way to begin a blog, but it's probably true, especially if you are a rock fan like myself. The sad truth is that the new millennium is coming up short with producing good rock acts and this decade is quickly coming to a close. (less than 2 years to go!) A lot of good albums have actually come out in the last ten years but most of them are from bands from the 80s, 90s or even the 60s or 70s.
My friends will generally throw the argument that I liked to use in the late 90s to defend current artists (they Devil's Advocate all the time) that I am just looking a what is out right now as in the last few months and judging it against all of the music I like from the past. Although many people do this, maybe even me, that is not the case this time. I actually couldn't sleep this morning so I made a list. A list of all of the big name bands that the 90s gave us Vs. the list from 2000 to now.
Here it is:
90s bands:
Nirvana, Stone Temple Pilots, Pearl Jam, Red Hot Chili Peppers, Soundgarden, Alice In Chains, Beck, Oasis, Rage Against the Machine, Incubus, System of a Down, Nine Inch Nails, Smashing Pumpkins, The Cranberries, Filter, The Dave Matthews Band, Blues Traveler, Korn, Limp Bizkit (ughh I know), No Doubt, Green Day, Skid Row (yes, the early 90s belonged to metal if you remember), Tool, Black Label Society, Pantera, The Mighty Mighty Bosstones, Radiohead, Foo Fighters, Queens of the Stone Age, Coldplay, Creed......the list goes on and on.
Now here is the 2000-2008 list.
3 Doors Down, Nickelback, (I'm starting to heave) The Strokes, The Arctic Monkeys, The Killers, The White Stripes, Linkin Park, Fall Out Boy, That Band that Sounds just like Fall Out Boy, Death Cab for Cutie, A.F.I, Andrew W.K., is that it? There might be more, but I couldn't care less.
Now name one rockstar out of that whole bunch. Jack White? He is about the only one with a rock star quality. I could name a few other members from those bands, but that's cuz I'm a rock nut. Now look at the 90s list. Creed, blech. Well, they weren't all great. But still there were lots of ROCK STARS in those bands. At least you know who the hell Scott Stapp is. Even the average rock fan, not an obsessed trivia nut like me could name at least one person from most of those bands. And P.S., yes I realize that technically come of the 90s bands first EP which NOONE HEARD was realeased in like 89' or that some of the 2000 bands came out in late 99 with a single only released in Canada. My point still stands.
Now I am not saying this to bash new rock bands. I like about half of the ones in that list and think that some of them bring real originality to the table. But it is still a far cry from even the 90s. (Let's not even talk about the big names from before the 90s, because I might cry.) And where are the ROCK STARS? Where are my Kurt Cobains and Axl Roses? No wonder kids today listen to nothing but classic rock and are out buying AC/DC and Iron Maiden t-shirts. Or even worse yet, giving up and turning to Rap.
If any rockers are out there who have the ability to be the next big thimg, let's hear it. You have less than 14 months to do it.
I know that is a shitty way to begin a blog, but it's probably true, especially if you are a rock fan like myself. The sad truth is that the new millennium is coming up short with producing good rock acts and this decade is quickly coming to a close. (less than 2 years to go!) A lot of good albums have actually come out in the last ten years but most of them are from bands from the 80s, 90s or even the 60s or 70s.
My friends will generally throw the argument that I liked to use in the late 90s to defend current artists (they Devil's Advocate all the time) that I am just looking a what is out right now as in the last few months and judging it against all of the music I like from the past. Although many people do this, maybe even me, that is not the case this time. I actually couldn't sleep this morning so I made a list. A list of all of the big name bands that the 90s gave us Vs. the list from 2000 to now.
Here it is:
90s bands:
Nirvana, Stone Temple Pilots, Pearl Jam, Red Hot Chili Peppers, Soundgarden, Alice In Chains, Beck, Oasis, Rage Against the Machine, Incubus, System of a Down, Nine Inch Nails, Smashing Pumpkins, The Cranberries, Filter, The Dave Matthews Band, Blues Traveler, Korn, Limp Bizkit (ughh I know), No Doubt, Green Day, Skid Row (yes, the early 90s belonged to metal if you remember), Tool, Black Label Society, Pantera, The Mighty Mighty Bosstones, Radiohead, Foo Fighters, Queens of the Stone Age, Coldplay, Creed......the list goes on and on.
Now here is the 2000-2008 list.
3 Doors Down, Nickelback, (I'm starting to heave) The Strokes, The Arctic Monkeys, The Killers, The White Stripes, Linkin Park, Fall Out Boy, That Band that Sounds just like Fall Out Boy, Death Cab for Cutie, A.F.I, Andrew W.K., is that it? There might be more, but I couldn't care less.
Now name one rockstar out of that whole bunch. Jack White? He is about the only one with a rock star quality. I could name a few other members from those bands, but that's cuz I'm a rock nut. Now look at the 90s list. Creed, blech. Well, they weren't all great. But still there were lots of ROCK STARS in those bands. At least you know who the hell Scott Stapp is. Even the average rock fan, not an obsessed trivia nut like me could name at least one person from most of those bands. And P.S., yes I realize that technically come of the 90s bands first EP which NOONE HEARD was realeased in like 89' or that some of the 2000 bands came out in late 99 with a single only released in Canada. My point still stands.
Now I am not saying this to bash new rock bands. I like about half of the ones in that list and think that some of them bring real originality to the table. But it is still a far cry from even the 90s. (Let's not even talk about the big names from before the 90s, because I might cry.) And where are the ROCK STARS? Where are my Kurt Cobains and Axl Roses? No wonder kids today listen to nothing but classic rock and are out buying AC/DC and Iron Maiden t-shirts. Or even worse yet, giving up and turning to Rap.
If any rockers are out there who have the ability to be the next big thimg, let's hear it. You have less than 14 months to do it.
Tuesday, November 18, 2008
So awful a 10 year old could do it
Enjoy my new icon. It was one of my first times using photoshop and is...as stated....awful. I know kids that could do better. Which, by the way, is why I canceled my XBOX 360 live gold membership. For those of you who don't know the gold membership for XBOX live allows you to play others head to head in games like Halo, Brothers in Arms or cooperatively in role playing games. I had an abundance of time on my hands in the Summer, so I signed up. (It's not that expensive if you buy a multi-month package) ANYWAY- I spent most of my time playing one of my favorite games, Halo 3, only to be schooled and shot in the head repeatedly by foul mouthed 10 year olds. Here I was trying to watch my language and listening to kids who were like "Hi, how old are you?", which instantly tells you that you are not competing with all adults. (It was about a 50/50 kid to adult ratio I would say)
Here is what a conversation might go like:
Kid: "Hi, how old are you?"
Me"...uuuhh..old. Let's just kill things, okay?"
Kid: "Wow, you're like an adult, huh?"
Me: "Yeah, this game was pretty much made for adults. You know it's rated.."
Kid: " I'm only 12. I like this game. But there are lots of faggots who play this game, too. I hate those faggots"
Me: "Whoa, you shouldn't say that."
Kid: "Say what?"
Me: "You shouldn't say fag or faggots. Do you know..."
Kid 2: "Yeah I was playing with this fag the other day and he totally cheated."
Me" ugh"
Kid 1: Yeah I can't stand when fags do that shit. Neither can my brother. He's playing with us, too. He's only eight.
8 year old: Yeah, fuck them faggots we played yesterday!
As you can see, kids these days who play Halo 3 love to shoot computer generated super soldiers, cut me off when talking, have no social skills, curse and use the word fag, faggot, faggoty, etc, even though I am pretty sure they have no idea what the word really means. (Neither did I at that age, but that story is for another day.)
And despite schools, parents and celebrities doing court mandated PSAs, kids still love to give out personal info on the web. Here is another scenario of what it was like playing this game.
Me: "Hey team. Let's kick some ass!"
kid 1: Hey, wow I like your accent! Where are you from BC.
Me: America
Kid 1: Me too. But like, where in America?
Me: The best part. Oh shit I just got sniped.
Kid 1: Man, fuck them faggots.
Me: You shouldn't say..
Kid 1: I'm from Boston.
Me: Oh, cool.
Kid 1: Yeah, my parents aren't home so I just play Halo all day.
Me. Mhmm. ( I finally kill another player, he has like 25 kills) I can see that.
Kid 1: Yeah, do you know where (fill in random name) store is? I live right behind..
Me.UHHH. I don't want to know.
Kid 1: No, no, you know where the...
Me: Signing off!
Wow. And I thought my generation was stupid. Now, seriously no kid was ever that bad about giving personal info, but I bet if someone tried that they would. TALK to your kids about this shit, please America.
Here is what a conversation might go like:
Kid: "Hi, how old are you?"
Me"...uuuhh..old. Let's just kill things, okay?"
Kid: "Wow, you're like an adult, huh?"
Me: "Yeah, this game was pretty much made for adults. You know it's rated.."
Kid: " I'm only 12. I like this game. But there are lots of faggots who play this game, too. I hate those faggots"
Me: "Whoa, you shouldn't say that."
Kid: "Say what?"
Me: "You shouldn't say fag or faggots. Do you know..."
Kid 2: "Yeah I was playing with this fag the other day and he totally cheated."
Me" ugh"
Kid 1: Yeah I can't stand when fags do that shit. Neither can my brother. He's playing with us, too. He's only eight.
8 year old: Yeah, fuck them faggots we played yesterday!
As you can see, kids these days who play Halo 3 love to shoot computer generated super soldiers, cut me off when talking, have no social skills, curse and use the word fag, faggot, faggoty, etc, even though I am pretty sure they have no idea what the word really means. (Neither did I at that age, but that story is for another day.)
And despite schools, parents and celebrities doing court mandated PSAs, kids still love to give out personal info on the web. Here is another scenario of what it was like playing this game.
Me: "Hey team. Let's kick some ass!"
kid 1: Hey, wow I like your accent! Where are you from BC.
Me: America
Kid 1: Me too. But like, where in America?
Me: The best part. Oh shit I just got sniped.
Kid 1: Man, fuck them faggots.
Me: You shouldn't say..
Kid 1: I'm from Boston.
Me: Oh, cool.
Kid 1: Yeah, my parents aren't home so I just play Halo all day.
Me. Mhmm. ( I finally kill another player, he has like 25 kills) I can see that.
Kid 1: Yeah, do you know where (fill in random name) store is? I live right behind..
Me.UHHH. I don't want to know.
Kid 1: No, no, you know where the...
Me: Signing off!
Wow. And I thought my generation was stupid. Now, seriously no kid was ever that bad about giving personal info, but I bet if someone tried that they would. TALK to your kids about this shit, please America.
Sunday, November 16, 2008
Dissatisfied Housewives
This, I swear to you is not an article that rips on Desperate Housewives. I don't care about that show.
This is about the fact that I am tired of hearing housewives complain that their life is hard. It's not so much that they anger me, as that there are a few things I would love to tell them that they could do to make it more bearable, but it would probably come off as sounding rude.
1. Get a job
I know it sounds simple, but it is true. I feel like a lot of the women (or men) who are dissatisfied just aren't challenged. They went from having a job where they had goals and had to race against time and got to interact with competitors and peers to being in the house ALL DAY doing things that they used to accomplish in their spare time. How could that be challenging? You don't have a boss, you have no real deadlines, etc. etc. Unless you have small children or MANY children then being a housewife cannot be that hard. You are doing things that I do on my time off and I have two jobs.
Now I know that back in the 30's and 40's (and before that) most women who were married were housewives and that it did take them all day to do this work. But that was before modern conveniences. Let me give you a hypothetical time line to demonstrate:
Life in the 30's-
5 am- Get up, get dressed, start cooking. Make everything from scratch, because you have no other option. The children will help you but they aren't that much help. The older kids dress the younger ones to teach both independence. Pack a lunch for kids and husband while making breakfast. Chances are you have 5 children instead of 2.5 like the year 2008. No time to talk to your husband since you are so busy.
6am- Kids walk to school, husband is off to work. Start cleaning the dishes. Clean everything by hand. You have no paperware and no dishwasher. If you are quick you can be done by 7.
7am- Walk to the store. It is a mile away.
7:30 AM- Shop for groceries for the day. You must go grocery shopping at least every three days if you want fresh meats and cheeses since your icebox sucks and you have to carry everything home, so you can't have that many bags even if you have a wheeled carry all.
8 AM- Walk home with groceries.
8:30 AM- Start cooking again. You need to start now or it won't be ready for dinner and you family will be pissed.
9:30 AM- You sit down for a few minutes. You have really been working the past four and half hours and your feet hurt because they haven't invented good supporting sneakers yet. You eat for the first time today.
9:45- Back to work. The meat is in the oven. Time to start washing clothes by hand. You must work at this everyday since you have 5 kids and you have no washer or dryer.
10:45- Continue working on dinner.
11:45- Start cleaning pots and cooking utensils by hand.
12:45- make and eat lunch
1:30- Clean floors and brass by hand.
3:00- Get kids from school.
3:00-5:00- Take care of kids, work on homework with them, do more chores, check on dinner, set the table.
5:00- Dad comes home. Talk to him for the first time today.
5:30- Serve dinner. Eat with family.
6:30- Clean dishes by hand again. Children will help.
7:30- The day is over. You clocked in a 14 hour day today with one 45 min break and an hour break during meals, but you forgot to clean the bathroom. Add that to tomorrow's list.
And now a day in the life of a 2008 housewife* (without many small children who aren't in school or a disabled child you keep at home)
*These events are not based on speculation or stereotypes, but by what I have observed repeatedly by two individuals who will remain unnamed because I like them to much to embarrass them.
7AM- wake up. No need to rush to get dressed, you can do that after the kids go to school. Make yourself coffee, talk to the husband, listen to the news. The kids make themselves cereal.
7:55-8:00- Check kids backpack for homework, put dishes in dishwasher. Walk kids to bus stop.
8:00-9:30- Get showered, get dressed, eat breakfast, watch TV, talk to girlfriend on the phone about your day and how you hate grocery shopping.
9:30-11:30-Put some meat product in the crock pot. Throw a load of clothes into the washer. Drive to grocery store. Leisurely grocery shop. Talk to every friend you run into. This will be the only time you go shopping this week, other than a quick run into a convenience store.
11:30-11:45- Unpack groceries. Change over wash.
11:45-12:45- Go out to lunch with a friend.
12:45- Fold wash from first load. Change over to next load. Vacuum a few rooms.
1:45-Look at catalogs.
2:15-Check crock pot. Fold the rest of the clothes.
2:30-Talk on the phone with a friend. Put pictures into a picture book. Shop online for decorations.
3:30- Kids come home. Talk to them about their day. Work on homework with them. Finish preparing dinner. Kids set the table.
5:30- Dad comes home. Eat with family.
6:30-7: Wash the few dishes that couldn't fit into the dishwasher.
Your day is over, and you actually worked around six hours today with 4 and a half hours of breaks including meals. You completed all of the same work as your 1930s counterpart, and there is no reason why you should be tired unless you have chronic fatigue syndrome or you drank too much at lunch with your friend. (Hey, it happens)
Once again, it might be that you hate being a housewife because you don't feel challenged.
2. Stop doing unnecessary shit.
It seems like most people that I run into that aren't unchallenged are simply over burdened. And they still don't have the same satisfaction they had in the work force. So if you can't or won't get a job at least cut back on the things that you don't NEED to do. That means that you don't have to volunteer for every committee, just do one. You don't need to sign you kids up for every class, and sport. Let them be kids. You don't need to be there for them through every little thing. So put the 300 page parenting book down if you have already read five of them and let your kids fail at something. They need to know failure by themselves before they are in college anyway or they are going to be a mess.
3. Remember this and find comfort in it: You don't have a boss.
And if you feel like your husband, kids or anyone else in your life is your boss then it is because you need to work on your relationship with them and it has nothing to do with being a housewife. Lay down the law.
I hope this helps, or was at least entertaining.
This is about the fact that I am tired of hearing housewives complain that their life is hard. It's not so much that they anger me, as that there are a few things I would love to tell them that they could do to make it more bearable, but it would probably come off as sounding rude.
1. Get a job
I know it sounds simple, but it is true. I feel like a lot of the women (or men) who are dissatisfied just aren't challenged. They went from having a job where they had goals and had to race against time and got to interact with competitors and peers to being in the house ALL DAY doing things that they used to accomplish in their spare time. How could that be challenging? You don't have a boss, you have no real deadlines, etc. etc. Unless you have small children or MANY children then being a housewife cannot be that hard. You are doing things that I do on my time off and I have two jobs.
Now I know that back in the 30's and 40's (and before that) most women who were married were housewives and that it did take them all day to do this work. But that was before modern conveniences. Let me give you a hypothetical time line to demonstrate:
Life in the 30's-
5 am- Get up, get dressed, start cooking. Make everything from scratch, because you have no other option. The children will help you but they aren't that much help. The older kids dress the younger ones to teach both independence. Pack a lunch for kids and husband while making breakfast. Chances are you have 5 children instead of 2.5 like the year 2008. No time to talk to your husband since you are so busy.
6am- Kids walk to school, husband is off to work. Start cleaning the dishes. Clean everything by hand. You have no paperware and no dishwasher. If you are quick you can be done by 7.
7am- Walk to the store. It is a mile away.
7:30 AM- Shop for groceries for the day. You must go grocery shopping at least every three days if you want fresh meats and cheeses since your icebox sucks and you have to carry everything home, so you can't have that many bags even if you have a wheeled carry all.
8 AM- Walk home with groceries.
8:30 AM- Start cooking again. You need to start now or it won't be ready for dinner and you family will be pissed.
9:30 AM- You sit down for a few minutes. You have really been working the past four and half hours and your feet hurt because they haven't invented good supporting sneakers yet. You eat for the first time today.
9:45- Back to work. The meat is in the oven. Time to start washing clothes by hand. You must work at this everyday since you have 5 kids and you have no washer or dryer.
10:45- Continue working on dinner.
11:45- Start cleaning pots and cooking utensils by hand.
12:45- make and eat lunch
1:30- Clean floors and brass by hand.
3:00- Get kids from school.
3:00-5:00- Take care of kids, work on homework with them, do more chores, check on dinner, set the table.
5:00- Dad comes home. Talk to him for the first time today.
5:30- Serve dinner. Eat with family.
6:30- Clean dishes by hand again. Children will help.
7:30- The day is over. You clocked in a 14 hour day today with one 45 min break and an hour break during meals, but you forgot to clean the bathroom. Add that to tomorrow's list.
And now a day in the life of a 2008 housewife* (without many small children who aren't in school or a disabled child you keep at home)
*These events are not based on speculation or stereotypes, but by what I have observed repeatedly by two individuals who will remain unnamed because I like them to much to embarrass them.
7AM- wake up. No need to rush to get dressed, you can do that after the kids go to school. Make yourself coffee, talk to the husband, listen to the news. The kids make themselves cereal.
7:55-8:00- Check kids backpack for homework, put dishes in dishwasher. Walk kids to bus stop.
8:00-9:30- Get showered, get dressed, eat breakfast, watch TV, talk to girlfriend on the phone about your day and how you hate grocery shopping.
9:30-11:30-Put some meat product in the crock pot. Throw a load of clothes into the washer. Drive to grocery store. Leisurely grocery shop. Talk to every friend you run into. This will be the only time you go shopping this week, other than a quick run into a convenience store.
11:30-11:45- Unpack groceries. Change over wash.
11:45-12:45- Go out to lunch with a friend.
12:45- Fold wash from first load. Change over to next load. Vacuum a few rooms.
1:45-Look at catalogs.
2:15-Check crock pot. Fold the rest of the clothes.
2:30-Talk on the phone with a friend. Put pictures into a picture book. Shop online for decorations.
3:30- Kids come home. Talk to them about their day. Work on homework with them. Finish preparing dinner. Kids set the table.
5:30- Dad comes home. Eat with family.
6:30-7: Wash the few dishes that couldn't fit into the dishwasher.
Your day is over, and you actually worked around six hours today with 4 and a half hours of breaks including meals. You completed all of the same work as your 1930s counterpart, and there is no reason why you should be tired unless you have chronic fatigue syndrome or you drank too much at lunch with your friend. (Hey, it happens)
Once again, it might be that you hate being a housewife because you don't feel challenged.
2. Stop doing unnecessary shit.
It seems like most people that I run into that aren't unchallenged are simply over burdened. And they still don't have the same satisfaction they had in the work force. So if you can't or won't get a job at least cut back on the things that you don't NEED to do. That means that you don't have to volunteer for every committee, just do one. You don't need to sign you kids up for every class, and sport. Let them be kids. You don't need to be there for them through every little thing. So put the 300 page parenting book down if you have already read five of them and let your kids fail at something. They need to know failure by themselves before they are in college anyway or they are going to be a mess.
3. Remember this and find comfort in it: You don't have a boss.
And if you feel like your husband, kids or anyone else in your life is your boss then it is because you need to work on your relationship with them and it has nothing to do with being a housewife. Lay down the law.
I hope this helps, or was at least entertaining.
Saturday, November 15, 2008
If jiggle could kill
Beyonce and Shakira would be mass murderers. Check out the video for beautiful liar (url below) and you will be blown away. The first time I saw this video I was in the gym and could not hear a word they were saying as my headphones were on, but it was awesome. These two use every camera trick and scantily clad outfit known in this 3min 27sec video designed to make women jealous and men drool. They were dancing in the rain, wearing psuedo-asain cleavage gowns, and one outfit they had to have been glued into. Holy tube top Batman! I have since heard the song and it is also okay, but not really neccessary to enjoy the video.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_aLFmVwbxro
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_aLFmVwbxro
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